… but in I Kings chapter 15 verse 14 it says, "But the high places were not removed: nevertheless Asa's heart was perfect with the Lord all his days." What this is saying is that King Asa had a shortcoming or a failure in his leadership where he did not remove the high places. He allowed the high places to exist. He cleaned up a lot of other things about the kingdom. He did a lot of right things, but 1 area where he came short was that he didn’t get rid of the high places, but God still looked at him and said, "Nevertheless his heart was perfect with the Lord all his days." God was willing to overlook that shortcoming on his part. Now in a perfect world obviously he wouldn't done that right too, but God looked at that and said, "Hey, it's not as big of a deal."
Now there were other sins that different kings committed at were a deal-breaker as it were. It just made them a bad king in His sight. Now first of all, I want to talk about when it comes to a church. There is no perfect church. If you're out looking for a church, there are always going to be shortcomings and imperfections in a church. You have to ask yourself what is that is a deal-breaker about a church where we should just not go to church there and what is it that is something may be wrong with the church but that we could just overlook and still think, "Hey, this is still a good church. This is still a viable church that I could attend."
First of all, the number 1 deal-breaker when it comes to church is having the wrong gospel and that’s in Galatians chapter 1 here. Because it says in verse 6, "I marvel that you're so soon removed from him that called you into the grace of Christ unto another gospel: which is not another but there be some that trouble you, and would pervert the gospel of Christ." What the bible is saying here is that their gospel it's not a completely different gospel. It's just a twisting and a perversion of the true gospel. He says, "But though we, or angel from heaven preach any other gospel unto you than that which we preached unto you, let him be accursed. As we said before, so say I now again, if any man preach any other gospel unto you that that ye have received, let him be accursed."
Obviously, we don’t want to have anything to do with accurse. We don’t want to participate in a church. If a church is preaching another gospel, that is a deal-breaker. We should have nothing to do with that church. We should not go to that church. We should not attend that church. Now there is no secret about what that other gospel is because if we read the book of Galatians, it's really clear in virtually every chapter what that false gospel. We could just look at a few examples. Look at chapter 2, just look at a few highlights. It would really take us reading the whole book of Galatians to see this really driven in very strongly.
Look at Galatians 2:16 just for a sample, "Knowing that a man is not justified by the works of the law but by the faith of Jesus Christ, even we have believed in Jesus Christ, that we might be justified by the faith of Christ not by the works of the law; for by the works of the law shall no flesh be justified." Flip over to chapter 3 verse 1, "O foolish Galatians, who hath bewitched you, that ye should not obey the truth, before whose eyes Jesus Christ hath been evidently set forth, crucified among you? This only would I learn of you, received you the Spirit by the works of the law, or by the hearing of faith? Are you so foolish? Having begun in the Spirit, are you now made perfect by the flesh?" Again, in every chapter he is driving in the point that salvation is by faith and not by works.
The other gospel that had crept in was salvation by works or a combination of faith plus works. It starts with faith but it's made perfect by works. He says, "Not, that’s foolishness." If you get into chapter 4, 5, 6, you'll see the same thing over and over again. He's saying that those that want to be justified by the law instead of being justified by faith that Christ is of no effect unto them and he goes on and on. It's what the whole book is about. It is probably the best book in the bible to defeat work salvation if you just read chapters 1 through 6. The book of Galatians is the most powerful book in the bible in my opinion against work salvation, because that’s what the subject of the whole book is.
That’s a wrong gospel and that is a deal-breaker. When you have a church that is mixing works and with the salvation then that is not something that can be overlooked and you could say, "It's a good church. They do a lot of good things. They preach …" but if they're preaching work salvation let them be accursed, not something that we can overlook that is a deal-breaker. Number 2, go to Revelation 22, another deal-breaker when it comes to what church we should attend is the wrong bible. The wrong bible is a deal-breaker. If the word of God is our final authority in all matters of faith and practice, then if you've got wrong bible you're going to have all kinds of things wrong.
What I mean by the wrong bible is the so-called versions of the bible, these new versions that are supposedly improved and easier to und but that take out the entire verses, removed entire phrases, add phrases in, change key doctrines that is a deal-breaker. Because look at Revelation 22 verse 18, one of the sternest curses in the entire bible, "For I testify unto every man that heareth the words of the prophecy of this book. If any man shall add unto these things, God shall add unto him the plagues that are written in this book. And if any man shall take away from the words of the book of this prophecy, God shall take away his part out of the book of life, and out of the holy city, and from the things which are written in this book."
Now with that strong of accurse placed upon anyone who would tamper with God's word, we should not want to touch these false perversions of the bible with a 10-foot pole. Once we know that they are false and that they removed that they’ve added, we should realize that this curse is upon these versions and the curse is upon those who preach these versions and we need to be very, very careful to stay away f false versions of the bible. Wrong bibles are deal-breaker. I've heard people say this, "This church has everything right. They have all the right doctrine, but it's just they're not using the King James Bible."
I don’t believe that for 1 second. It's impossible to have everything right if you're not reading the King James, because these other versions are going to lead you into false doctrine and lead you into heresy because they change all kinds of key doctrines. Look, even if theoretically they did have everything else right I'd still would have nothing to do with it, because the wrong bible is a deal-breaker in and of itself. Look at Deuteronomy chapter 22.
Deuteronomy chapter 22 is a passage where we get a symbolic teaching on biblical separate. This is one that’s not explicit here, but it's symbolic. It talks about in Deuteronomy chapter 22 verse 9, "Thou shalt not sow thy vineyard with divers seeds: lest the fruit of thy seed which thou hast sown, and the fruit of thy vineyard, be defiled." If we were to take the literal interpretation of this, he's saying no GMOs. Don’t plant it with a bunch of Monsanto roundup ready corn. Don’t use the GMO. If we were to talk a symbolic look at this and he's saying, "Hey, don’t sow the vineyard with divers seeds," different types of seeds. Don’t plow, verse 10, with an ox and an ax together. Thou shalt not wear a garment of divers sorts, as of woolen and linen together.
If we look at the separation that he's teaching here, the seed is the word of God. The bible says that we are born again, not of corruptible seed, but of incorruptible by the word of God, which liveth and abideth forever. The sower sows the word. The seed is the word of God. If we are not to sow the field with mingled seeds that means we shouldn't be in a church where we're sowing all different; we were sowing the King James seed over here and sowing the NIV over here. It's the King James from the pulpit and it's the NIV in the youth group and the Sunday school. Hey, let's not sow the field with divers seeds. Let's make sure that we've all got the same seed in our seed bag. If we're going to go forth weeping, bearing precious seed, it better be the real true word of God.
The English said, "What about people that don’t speak English?" Shut up. We're talking about people that speak English tonight.
"What about people …" Look, obviously we're not telling people who don’t speak English to use an English bible. "Avoid foolish questions," the bible says. That is a foolish question. This is America. We speak English. We use the King James Bible. If we're in another country speaking another language then we'll talk about that. We'll talk about which Spanish bible do you use. We'll talk about which bible do you use in Portuguese or which bible do you use in German or French. It's just a foolish question of someone who can’t see the blaring obvious difference between a King James and an NIV, between a King James and an ESV.
One of them is calling the Joseph, Jesus' father. One of them teaches that it's just God the Father. He's the only Father that Jesus had. One of them is teaching that Jesus is eternally preexistent from everlasting. The other says that Jesus had an origin. One of them is teaching that salvation is a narrow way and few are saved. Another one is teaching that it's hard to get saved, which implies work salvation. One of them teaches that you're already saved, the King James Bible. Another one teaches that you're being saved, the New King James, the NIV, the ESV, et cetera.
There's a colossal difference and yet people will ask foolish questions like, "Are you saying everybody in the world needs to learn English?" No, I'm saying English speakers need to learn English. I'm saying that people who speak English should read the King James Bible. People who speak other languages should have the bible in their own language in the tongue where they're born. We should not sow the field with divers seeds just using the version of the month, whatever the flavor of the month is because they literally come out with a new version of the bible very month.
Because of copyright law they all have to be at least 4 percent different from one another. You do the math. When you got 400 and some versions and they're all 4 percent different from one another, God is not the author of confusion but abridge confusion. The wrong bible is a deal-breaker. He also says in verse 11, "Thou shalt not wear garment of divers sorts, as of woolen and linen together." Now what's the difference between woolen and linen? Woolen is an animal-based garment. Woolen is from sheep. Linen is a plant-based textile. Linen is plant base from flax.
Now there's nothing wrong with wool and there's nothing wrong with linen. God is telling you, "Hey, don’t mix wool and linen." Why did He not want them to mix that? Because again it's symbolic, because wool represents the lamb Jesus. If you remember, when Adam and Eve sin they tried to cover their own sin with a plant-based garment, an apron of fig leaves. God replaced that with coats of skins, the animal-based garment and that pictured salvation through Jesus putting on that robe of righteousness being cloaked in his righteousness, the righteousness of the lamb versus that which is man-made.
Then again when we look at Cain, Cain brings an offering of the fruits of the ground, plant-based and then Abel brings the firstlings of the flock in the fat thereof, animal-based. What is it picturing? Again, Abel's reliance on the lamb Jesus as his salvation, Abel relying on the produce of his own works. When the bible is saying don’t wear a garment of woolen and linen together he is saying the robe of righteousness that gets you saved. That wedding garment without which you will be cast into outer darkness is not a mixed garment of wool and linen, it's not a mixture of faith and works, it's not a mixture of Jesus plus what you produce. No, it's all Jesus.
Now look, there's nothing wrong with wool and there's nothing wrong with linen. Don’t mix them. See, faith is great. Faith is what saves you. Works are great. Works are a great way to please the Lord, but don’t mix them because they are 2 different things. They both have a place. The bible teaches that linen is a good garment that wool is a garment, but he says, "Don’t mix the 2." Don’t mix faith and works. Don’t mix that which saves you and then the Christian life that you live after you're saved.
Because a lot of people when we say, "Hey, you don’t have to do works to be saved," they'll say, "Oh, you're against doing works." We're not against works. We're saying works don’t save you. We're saying works are a part of the Christian life and pleasing God and loving God, but they're not part of salvation. You say, "Hey, you don’t have to repent of your sins to be saved. You're against repentance. You don’t preach repenting of your sin." We do preach repenting of your sins for saved people to do every day. We all need to repent of sin throughout our lives, but when you try to mix that with grace and try to mix that with salvation that’s where you have a problem.
What's the bible teaching here? Don’t mix the true seed, the incorruptible seed with the corruptible seed of false twisted version of the bible. Don’t mix salvation by faith with salvation by works. These are the 2 first deal-breakers in a church. Number 1, deal-breaker is the wrong gospel, because we're not going to mix wool and linen together. God says … Second deal-breaker wrong bible, don’t sow divers seeds. Accurse should be he who adds to or takes from God's work. Accurse should be he that preaches another gospel. We'll go to Revelation chapter 2 for another deal-breaker; Revelation chapter 2. I believe no deal-breaker in a church is no soul winning. No soul winning is a deal-breaker.
Now I will say this. If you go to a church that has no soul winning or if the only good church in your area the only thing that you can find that’s King James and preaching the gospel is non-soul-winning church then one thing that you could do is you could attempt to start soul winning in that church. Because if you look at Revelation 2 this church has quit the soul winning. Because it says in verse 5, "Remember therefore from whence thou art fallen and repent and do the first works, they're not doing the first works." Again, I'm not going to spend all the time to preach this and prove this. I've done it in another sermon. The first work is evangelizing. It's giving the gospel to every creature. This church had forgotten that and it gotten away from that and it failed to do that.
He says, "Repent and do the first works or else I will come unto thee quickly and will remove thy candlestick out of its place, except thou repent." If you were in an area where the only church that you could go to was one that didn’t have soul winning, you can attempt to start soul winning and fix this before that candlestick is removed and try to remedy that. If you go to the church and there's no soul winning and you try to start up soul winning and attempt to get a soul-winning program going and they are not interested, you need to find a different church because of the fact that that’s just the deal-breaker. What's the point?
If God says, "I'll remove your can-…" A lot of people don’t understand. What does it mean to remove the candlestick? Revelation 1 defined the candlesticks as the 7 churches. He said, "The 7 candlesticks which thou sawest are the 7 churches." When He says, "I'll remove thy candlestick out of its place," I believe that that means that God will cease to view that church as a legitimate church in His sight. They might continue to meet and be in a building together, but He is going to look at that and say, "This is no longer legitimate." The candlestick, remember?
I've often used the illustration about the colonel coming down where there is the KFC that it'd deviated from Kentucky Fried Chicken's rules and so a big crane had to come and remove the colonel's head, because they were no longer worthy of having the image of Colonel Sanders because they were no longer KFC. They had lost the franchise. There are a lot of churches today that lost the franchise because they have the wrong bible, because they have the wrong gospel, because they don’t have soul winning.
You know what, you could go to that church and bring your tithes to that church, but it's not going to the Lord because God doesn’t even see that as a biblical church. It'd be like if I said, "Hey, can you deposit this money into my bank account? I bank at Wells Fargo," and then you took it down to Chase Bank. He'd say, "I put it in your account. I took it to Chase Bank." I don’t bank at Chase bank. God is looking down saying, "Hey, I don’t bank at that church its preaching." Out of another version that’s not the bible. I don’t bank at that church that has a different gospel. That church was given a chance to start soul winning and to do the first works and repented that and they’ve continued not to be an evangelizing soul-winning church.
I don’t bank there. The colonel has been removed. They’ve lost the franchise. They’ve lost the candlestick. They are no longer seen as a biblical church in my sight. If you were in a position where you all you had was a church that preaches the King James and is right on salvation but doesn’t have any soul winning then the best thing to do would be to try to help them fix that by starting up soul winning. I've known people who've done that where they approach the pastor and said, "Hey, I'd like to start up a soul-winning program." They were able to get that going and they were able to start that program up. That’s a blessing and they can have a great influence by doing that.
Here are some things that are not deal-breakers. I don’t think biblically these things are the deal-breakers. These are not things that would make me rule out a church or that I would just separate from people over these things. First of all, being wrong on the pre-trib rapture o bible prophecy issues that’s not a deal-breaker for me having a different interpretation of bible prophecy. I don’t think that that is something right. We just say, "Hey, I just can’t go to this church. I will never go to that church." Because honestly that is not the most important doctrine in the bible.
Now again, I'm not saying that I'm not excusing people for having these foolish views based on Hollywood films and based on the Scofield Reference Bible and man's tradition and man's teaching. Don’t get me wrong. I don’t think God was condoning the high places. You think God condoned them worshipping in high places? No, but He said, "Hey, even though they have high places he still did that which was right in the side of the Lord." I think this falls into that same category where people can have goofed up use of bible prophecy and wrong views on the rapture. I don’t think that’s a deal-breaker. I don’t think you could point to scripture where hey that’s a deal-breaker.
When the bible says, "Let no man deceive you," what that mean is that you shouldn't fall for it or believe in it yourself. Now another thing that I don’t think is a deal-breaker is a church that has the wrong music and, again, don’t get me wrong. People are like, "What in the world, like I'm just condoned. Christ is so permissive." I'm not saying, "Hey, these things are fine. These things are great." Look, they're not going to be allowed to creep into our church. We're not going to have a feminine, sissy, queer contemporary music up here.
We're not going to have the pre-trib rapture taught here. Another thing I don’t think is a deal-breaker is altar calls and invitations. I'm against them but it's not a deal-breaker. A church beats pro is real. That’s not a deal-breaker. They're wrong but it's not a deal-breaker. Being real patriotic and flag waving in America, that’s not a deal-breaker for me. The church has a Christian school, I don’t believe in that, but it's not a deal-breaker. The church has a nursery and children's church, not a deal-breaker. Now if they're trying to force me to put my kid in there then I'm not going to, but I don’t thing it's a deal-breaker.
You say, "Why bring all this stuff up, Pastor," and I say, "Because so many people don’t go to church and they use this excuse there's no good church in my area." Here's what they're looking for, the prefect church. They're looking for the Unicorn Church, the magical rainbow Unicorn 4-Leaf Clover Church and they understand that you're not always going to be able to find a perfect church that you need to find the best church in your area and certain things are deal-breakers and certain things aren't. I don’t think that God is putting a major curse on those who have the wrong music, altar calls or whatever. There is a major curse on those who preach a false gospel. There is a major curse on those who are adding to and removing from God's word. There is the curse of losing the candlestick on those who don’t do the first works and don’t have the first love.
You have to decide for yourself if you don’t agree with me, whatever. Study the bible and decide for yourself what's a deal-breaker and what isn't, but I will tell you this. God commands us to go to church. He says, "Not forsaking the assembling of ourselves together, as the manner of some is; but exhorting one another: and so much the more, as we see the day approaching." You say, "Why are you preaching this? We're all here, Pastor." I will say, "We're all in faith forth." The people I'm preaching to right now a lot of them will eventually live in another area. People will move away from here. People will live somewhere else and I don’t know what life is going to bring any of us. We all need to get it settled in our mind that we go to church, period.
We find the best church in our area and we seek for churches that don’t have these major things wrong. Then we overlook the things that are smaller issues that are not as big of a deal. Again, not condoning these things but I'm saying that they're not an excuse not to go to church and that we shouldn't just consider them a deal-breaker. That’s what I'm saying tonight, because there are a lot of people out there that are not going to church because of just little things that are wrong with the church in their area.
Look, if you know people, if you know anybody who is looking for a church and struggling to find a church, I know people are constantly asking me to help them find a church in their area and maybe you have people ask you the same thing, I don’t know. There are great resources online to help find church and usually when people contact me and say, "There's no good church in my area," I can usually always find them a list of churches to try that have the 3 deal-breakers right almost always.
Now the exception to this is sometimes people in foreign countries. That’s an exemption to this, because sometimes there really is no church in their area for them to go to. Anybody who is living in the United States as long as you're not living in Podunk Color, we're probably going to be able to find you a church. Here's what I do, just a quick way. I get so many emails I can’t answer them all. When I do get an email and I do happen to open it and read it and I see that somebody is looking for a church, here's what … I go to a website that’s called Military Get Saved and I don’t know why it's called but that’s what it's called.
I just Google Military Get Saved and I go to the church directory and has 6,000 independent fundamental King James Baptist churches in America; 6000. That’s a lot. I go on there and here's what I search. I use the control F feature on the keyboard, because it just lists all these churches for a state, Arizona in the list like 80 of them. Then it has other churches in red that are not King James; disregard the red stuff. That stuff is red for a reason. Anyway, the blue, Arizona lists like 80 or something, other states list 100.
Here's what I search for. I search for the word soul, S, O, U, L, because that will take me straight to all the soul winning churches in that state because on this particular website, most churches that have soul winning put the word soul winning. It's just really easy, takes seconds to go there and just search the word soul. If you live in a descent-sized city, there will be several churches that have soul winning listed. Let me tell you, usually churches that have soul winning and use the terms soul winning are usually right on the gospel and are usually King James. That’s why I just go straight for that criteria at that particular or you could just sit around and say, "Oh, there's no good churches so I'm just going to sit it home and eat chips off my chest and watch sermons on the internet."
Take some initiative and find a church and you know what, here's the thing. If you're traveling and you're out of town, I would encourage you to find a church in your area if you're working out of town or just talking to somebody before the service who's going to be working out of town over the next few weeks. He was asking me about churches in the area that he's going to be working. Look, that’s another chance to go on that website or different website and find a church that meets the basic criteria and get yourself to church and fellowship with God's people. It's important.
Number 2, when we talk about deal-breakers we talk first of all about deal-breakers in regard to a church. What about deal-breakers in regard to a spouse? Who you're going to marry? You're a single-young man. You're a single-young lady. What are the deal-breakers? What are the things that no matter how much you like this person, you need to not marry this person if they have these deal-breakers? Number 1 obviously if they're not saved. That’s a deal-breaker. The bible says in II Corinthians 6:14, "Be ye not unequally yoked together with unbelievers: for what fellowship hath righteousness with unrighteousness? And what communion hath light with darkness? And what concord hath Christ with Belial? Or what part hath he that believeth with an infidel?"
That tells me anyway that we shouldn’t have a lot in common with unsaved people anyway. If we're living a godly and separated life, we shouldn't have so much in common with unsaved people in the first place. Even if we think that we do God says, "Be not unequally yoked together with unbelievers," and so therefore that is a deal-breaker. If you're not going to marry an unbeliever, you should not even date an unbeliever. You should not get romantically involved in anyway shape or form with an unbeliever, because you are playing with fire.
If there's an unbeliever that you think you would like to get to know a day then what you can do is you can give that person the gospel and thank you to get them saved. If they get saved, great. Get them in church and maybe they can grow and be a viable person to get married to, but you should not at all date that person until they are saved. That is a deal-breaker. That should be obvious. That should go without saying.
Number 2, go to I Corinthians 16:22. I think another deal-breaker is just that if the person that you're dating or want to get married to does not love the Lord. You need to marry somebody who is not just saved but that actually loves the Lord. What does the bible say in I Corinthians chapter 16 verse 22? It says in I Corinthians 16:22, "If any man love not the Lord Jesus Christ, let him be Anathema Maranatha."
What is the bible saying here? Let him be Anathema if he doesn’t love the Lord. He didn’t say go marry them if they don’t love the Lord. We should choose a person that loves God. That’s why the bible says, "Favor is deceitful and beauty is vain. But a woman that feareth the Lord she shall be praised," and that’s in the context of looking for a wife. If you're looking for a wife, looking for a husband, it should be a deal-breaker when they don’t love God.
Sometimes you're going to meet somebody and they don’t have all their ducks in a row. They are not perfect, nobody is, but do they love God? Do they have a heart for God? Do they want to grow? Do they love preaching? Do they love reading the word of God? Is there potential? Are they going in the right direction? Are they a person who just doesn’t really care that much about the things of God? Isn't really that interested in church? Isn't it really that interested in reading the bible, gets offended by hard preaching? That’s a bad sign and that’s a deal-breaker when they don’t love God.
I remember when I was a teenager and I was trying to find a woman to get married to, often the first date was I would bring them to church with me and say, "Hey, I'll take you to church then we'll go to eat afterward." My motto was if you don’t like church I don’t like you. That was my motto. You have to … Because if they didn’t like Pastor Nichol's preaching, that was a deal-breaker for me because I love my church. I love the preaching and if they couldn't handle it and he get up, someone said, "Bring these girls," and he get up and rip face and they just be like, "What is his problem? Why does he hate Ellen Degeneres? What does he want [inaudible 00:29:48] with no food? I don’t know what he's saying. What's he talking about?"
I'm just like, "Let's get you home." Then other girls you bring, "This is cool. This is great. I love this church." I'd say, "It's potential here." You have to like church. You have to love the Lord. You have to like God's people in order to be a candidate in my opinion. Then thirdly, here's another major deal-breaker. If the person that you're dating is divorced, deal-breaker because the bible says in Luke 16 verse 18, "Whosoever putteth away his wife, and marrieth another, committeth adultery: and whosoever marrieth her that is put away from her husband committeth adultery."
Matthew 5:32, "But I say unto you, that whosoever shall put away his wife, saving for the cause of fornication, causeth her to commit adultery: and whosoever shall marry her that is divorced committeth adultery." This is something that is a deal-breaker. By the way, it's a deal-breaker for me to perform your wedding, too. I've had people ask me all the time, "Hey, can you perform my wedding?" First question is always this, "Have either of you ever been married before?" If they say yes they’ve been married before unless obviously if their spouse has died, if they're a widow or a widower.
If they’ve been married and divorced, I say, "I'm not going to be able to perform this wedding. I don’t participate in remarriages because the bible says that if you marry a woman that’s divorced, you're committing adultery. I can't have anything to do with that. I still love you. God bless you, but I'm not going to perform the ceremony." Usually, I just never see that person again, but that’s fine with me because I have integrity at the end of day. That’s what matters to me is that I do what the bible told me to do and that’s all I can do. That is a deal-breaker.
Here are some things that are not a deal-breaker when looking for a spouse. You know what? If she's not just drop-dead gorgeous, that’s not a deal-breaker. Pastor, she's not the most gorgeous woman I've ever seen in my life. That’s not a deal-breaker because of the fact that the bible says, "Favor is deceitful and beauty is vain. But a woman that feareth the Lord she shall be praised." We could say the same thing if he's not tall, dark and handsome, that’s not a deal-breaker either.
Here's the thing about that though is that women honestly don’t usually put as much emphasis on the hour to parents as men do. Just by nature, women don’t really care that much about the way and that’s great news for some of you guys. That’s the best news that you've heard all night, because here you are thinking that you're real limited in your prospect. I'm telling you the truth tonight, you have a chance. I'm preaching to a lot of you tonight, because honestly you do. Honestly, women don’t care what you like. You just have to be a man and you just have to have confidence and boldness and you have to have … Then all the women are thinking in their heart that I'm telling the truth because they know what I'm saying.
Honestly, with men it's about what's inside. A lot of men though foolishly will just ride off a lot of eligible single girls just because it's not the supermodel that they were looking for. Honestly, a lot of it is not even just because of what they think but they're worried about what other people think or something instead of just realizing, "Hey, God wants me to find a virtuous woman, a godly woman, righteous woman."
Now I will say this. Obviously, you have to like the way that you're wife look. You have to like the way that your husband look. You don’t want to marry somebody that you are not attracted to at all, but that should not be the main focus or the main criteria that you're looking for and that shouldn't be a deal-breaker if she doesn’t look perfect in every way, because beauty is in the eye of the beholder. I'll tell you this, I've been around people who outwardly are attractive but when you get to know them they begin to become ugly to you just because you know what they're like.
Then conversely people who the world would not look at as attractive as you get to know them and you get to know their personality and the inner beauty then actually their outward appearance begins to grow on you. You need to keep an open mind and understand these things and not get so hung up as men especially this point is for the men, because women don’t really have as much problem in this area. As men, you need to get less hung up on your own outward appearance and realize she doesn’t care what I look like.
Then you have to also get this attitude out of your mind that just says, "Oh, it's just all about finding the most beautiful, possible woman that I can," and understand that God says, "That’s vain. That’s deceitful." You need to look for a woman that fears the Lord. She shall be praised. Along the same lines another thing that should not be a deal-breaker is if he or she is not in perfect physical shape. That shouldn't be a deal-breaker. That's not the most important thing in our lives is being in shape because the bible says, "Bodily exercise profiteth little, but godliness is profitable unto all thing, having promise of the life that now is and of that which is to come."
A lot of you that are totally out of shape this is your life verse. You actually have this written. You have it written on the wall like bodily exercise profiteth a little right about your broken down treadmill or whatever. You have that verse inscribe upon the wall right next to the verse that says, "He that is strong in the faith eateth all things. It's all sanctified by the word of God and prayer." You think that prayer is going to fix McDonald's. You can somehow pr6ay to GMOs to realign in the way God created them or whatever. Anyway, I'm just kidding.
The bottom line is God does say that bodily exercise profiteth little. It's the exercise and the godliness that is profitable unto all things. Someone who is not in perfect physical shape, that shouldn't be a deal-breaker either. That shouldn't be the emphasis of what you're looking for in a husband or wife. There are other things that I don’t think are a deal-breaker. Like for example, a lot of men and I guess I mainly present men on this point, is that they expect to find just the perfect girl that’s the finish product. They don’t understand that part of being a husband is being a leader and part of it is actually teaching your wife and guiding your wife and being a leader and leading her to greater spiritual heights.
That’s part of our job as a husband is to be the spiritual role model and the spiritual leader. Just sit there and think, "If she's not spiritually dialed in perfectly then I just don’t want anything to do with her." See, you had to lead there. For example, I strongly believe that women should stay home, marry, bear children, guide the house. I believe in women being a homemaker, stay-at-home wife, stay-at-home mother that’s what I believe in. That’s what I've always preached. That’s what I've taught. That's how we live our lives and that the husband's job is the provider and the wife should be a keeper at home, et cetera.
A lot of times guys will just completely rule out a girl just because she has a job or is going to college or something like that. You just have to understand this is the culture that we live in. Girls are going to have jobs and go to college and whatever. The question is does she love the Lord, is she saved, does she love God and is she willing to follow, is she willing to understand that it's her job to submit unto her husband and let him be the leader when push comes to shelf.
I would recommend this young man. If you are going to marry and I just did a whole sermon on it if you're saying, "What in the world is [Pastor Aaron 00:37:55] is talking about?" You probably missed my sermon a few weeks ago where I biblically taught this in my sermon on women working in light of the bible about a month ago where we taught this. I would highly recommend that if you are dating a girl and you talk … First of all when, you're dating you should talk about what your values are and make sure that you're both going the same direction and that you both want to live the same type of lifestyle.
Sometimes you talk to people and like, "What? I have no idea." It's like, "What did you talk about when you're dating?" I remember when I was dating my wife we were ironing these things out. We're talking abut what we believe, what we're going to do with our lives, how are we going to rai0se the children, everything I get. Ironing those things out before the wedding day, but I would say this. It'd be a smart idea if this girl is working or in college or whatever and you're telling her, "Hey, I want you to be a stay-at-home wife and I want you to be a stay-at-home mother after we get married." It would be a great idea to make sure that she quits the job before the wedding day or quit school before the wedding day if that’s the agreement.
Then it'd just be this thing off in a distance and then you get married and she is like, "Oh, I change my mind. I want to keep on working and I want to keep doing my feminist thing and whatever," because then you can see what's really going on. It might not be a bad idea just to make sure and that would be a good test who's the boss or if she's actually going to do what you're telling her to do or whether she is just going to do the bait and switch on you and be a deceiver, which would be very wicked but it's out there. That’s just a tip for you guys.
Another thing I want to point out on that point though is that if the guy doesn’t have a job that is a deal-breaker. The bible says, "If a man provide not for his own especially for those of his own house, he had denied the faith and is worse than an infidel." By the way, let me just inset at this point that I think that women should have a higher standard for who they married than men. Because here's the thing, when you're the man you're the leader. If you're going to be a good leader, you can actually guide and fix some of these problems.
You know what? If you're the woman, you're marrying a leader. You're not the leader. You can’t say, "I'll teach him. I'll fix him. I'll straighten him out. I'll guide him in the right way or the right path." No, no, then you're going to have things bad. Honestly, I don’t feel bad for you single guys that are having trouble finding a wife. I don’t feel bad for you at all, because the ball is in your court buddy. Your destiny is in your own hand. You can go visit other independent fundamental Baptist churches. You can meet all kinds of girls. You already could actually talk to the single girls who actually go to our church for a change, but then quite men who visit our church frequently.
The ball is in your court. You can talk to them and meet them and greet them. Honestly, you can be a leader and you can do that whereas the girls have little bit harder because they're waiting for a guy to approach them that actually they want to follow and that they can actually look up to that’s going to be a leader. I do think that women should have a little bit higher standard even that the men and who they marry. If he doesn’t have a job, that’s a deal-breaker. He is lazy and not working and not providing that’s not going to work. That’s a bad situation. That is a deal-breaker.
Another question that I've often been asked and I know this is a really sensitive subject so I want to just be careful how I deal with this. I've been asked this question many, many times so I feel I should just briefly address it is that some people will say, "Hey, is it wrong for me to marry someone who is not a virgin?" I've been asked that question. Here's what I believe about it from studying the bible is that I don’t believe it's wrong, but I will say this though.
First of all if you're not a virgin then for you to demand, "I'm only going to marry virgin," is that a little bit hypocritical on you part? If you have not kept yourself pure and then you're demanding I'm only going to marry somebody virgin, but the world has that standard. A lot of Muslims have that standard where the men will go out and commit a bunch of fornication but demand that their wife be a virgin. It's a 2-way street. Both men and women we should all ourselves pure until our wedding day.
Let me say this that if you are a virgin as a man which you ought to be then if you decide in your heart I only want to marry, there's nothing wrong with you deciding. Hey, I only want to marry girl that’s a virgin. You know what? That’s fine if that’s your standard and that makes perfect sense. If you are and you decided that you're okay with marrying someone who is not, you know what, that’s something that you have to decide for yourself, whether you can live with that, whether you can forgive and forget and will pass that and move on.
It can be a tough thing, but I just wanted to put that out there that no I do not believe it as a sin to marry someone who is not. It is a sin to lose your own purity of course, but to marry someone who has made that mistake and repented and is now right with the Lord I do not think is sinful. It might be something that you can deal with and it might be something that just bothers you too much and you just decide hey no. If I kept myself pure then I'm going to marry someone who kept themselves pure also. That makes perfect sense.
I think that this is a personal choice bottom line that it's up to you. It's a personal choice what you want to do in that situation, whether you can handle that or not, if you can be okay with it or not. I will say this; there should be no deception before your marriage. It would be very wrong for you to lie and say that you are when you're not. You should be upfront and tell the truth to whoever you're getting married to.
Lastly, we talked about deal-breakers when it comes to church, deal-breakers when it comes to spouse. What about deal-breakers for a job? What's a deal-breaker for what kind of a job you should work? We talked about a church. We talked about your spouse. What about your job? Now there are so many points on this and so many questionable things. Again, this is something that I get asked all the time. People constantly asked me, "Hey, do you think it's wrong for me to do this job," or, "Hey, is it wrong for me to do this job?"
Here's the thing. We live in a sinful world. God didn’t want to remove us from the world, but He said He wanted to keep us from the evil. We are to be in the world but not of the world. I don’t believe that we need to seclude ourselves from this world and isolate ourselves from the world completely and say, "Hey, there was some sin at my job. I need you to just run screaming the other direction." We live in a sinful world. We're going to be around sin. God has ordained that we be in this world and around sin but that we would keep ourselves pure and keep ourselves from the evil.
We do not believe in isolating ourselves in a compound or going out and living in the middle of nowhere. No, you know why we live in the city? Because we're here to win souls to Jesus Christ, because we want to be around people, be a testimony, let our light shine before men and give the gospel and so on and so forth. What are some things that are deal-breakers? Here's the thing. I can give you my opinion on these things and I think I have the spirit of God. I can give you biblical opinions here, but at the end of the day you need to study the bible and decide for yourself what is a deal-breaker and what is not when it comes to your job.
I'll tell you some of personal convictions when it comes to jobs that I wouldn't work. Any job that involves mixing drinks and serving alcohol, I wouldn't do that job. When you're sitting there and mix them up drinks and serving booze, I wouldn't do that job the bible says, not even look at it. Look not upon the wine when it's red, when it gives its other color in the cup, when it moves itself for ride at the last, sting it like an ant or bite like a serpent; I know I got that backwards.
What he's saying there, we just stay away from alcohol and I don’t think that mixing drinks and serving alcohol is a great job for a Christian. That’s a deal-breaker for me. I was at a job. I worked at a restaurant that served alcohol and I worked in the kitchen and they wanted me to work upfront and it involves serving alcohol. I didn’t take the tiny raise that they want to give me and put me upfront because I said, "I don’t want to serve alcohol." I just stayed in the kitchen made a little less money, but honestly that was my conviction. It bothered me. I didn’t think it was right to handle serving beers and everything like that. I don’t want to ruin my testimony. I want people to see me doing that. I don’t want to vex my own righteous soul.
At the end of the day, the bible says, "Whatsoever is not faith is sin." If you don’t feel right about what you're doing, you shouldn't be doing it. If it makes you feel guilty on a daily basis that’s your conscience which is the candle of the Lord and that is some times God's spirit showing you things. A job that keeps us out of church is a deal-breaker. The bible says, "Seek ye first the kingdom of God in His righteousness and all these things …" talking about food, clothing, finances,"… shall be added unto you." A job that keeps you out of church is a deal-breaker. A job that forces you to lie or to be dishonest break God's commandments that’s a deal-breaker you can’t do that.
I'll say this personally and again this is one that’s one to interpretation, but personally working closely with Sodomites is a deal-breaker for me. I'll tell you this. When I used to run my fire alarm business I would go into businesses like Bed Bath and Beyond. Let's face it. A lot of dudes that work in Bed Bath and Beyond are not straight. Now there are a lot of nice straight guys that work above me on that do not want to be offensive to them. There are also sum queers that work at Bed Bath and Beyond let's face it. I would go into these stores a lot of time and it was some filthy Sodomite that was the manager whatever.
I would just try to seek out the assistant manager or whatever. Honestly, sometimes I had to deal with these perverts but it was just a matter of hey I just need you to sign here or whatever and then wash my hands and sanitize some and douse some hydrogen peroxide and then light them on fire for a second, shave all the hair off my arms and pave my flash in water and be unclean until the evening. Honestly, for me I can handle. I can handle just a brief interaction of where's the fire alarm panel and just hold by those get it signed or whatever.
For me personally, just working sign by sign with the sodomite that’s a deal-breaker for me. You're discriminating. Yes, I am. I remember one time my boss he told me about … Look, there was this company I worked for where it was like a revolving door. We went HR employees so fast. My boss just couldn't keep employees. He's just hiring new people every week, every week. One time he tells me, "Hey, I hired this guy. The only problem is he is a homosexual. He was just acting like I'm just going to have to deal with that.
I told them. I said, "I have no problem with you hiring this homo as long as I never have to see him, never have to talk to him. He never rides in my car and I don’t have anything to do with training him then go ahead and hire him. If I have anything to do with this guy, he's riding in my car and I'm training him and working with him on a daily basis then I'm going to go start looking for a new job today. No, no, it's fine. We'll find somebody else, no problem.
I'm not going to sit there and work with some filthy pervert and vex my righteous soul from day to day. Is that legal? I don’t care. I'm not going to work with fags. I don’t care if it's legal. Not going to happen. Ker, what you know? Make some loaf and some bakery. He has to bake a cake for these perverts. The media came to me and asked me, "Would you perform a wedding for couple of sodomites?" That’s the stupidest question in the world. Would you perform a wedding? I said, "I'll perform a wedding for them if they're going to be executed," like Leviticus 20:13 said, I don’t mind. I don’t mind if they get married before they get executed. That’s what the bible says.
If a man lies with mankind as he lied with the woman, both of them have committed an abomination. They should surely be put to death. Their blood shall upon them. If the government can execute them, I'll save the bells with them and then I'll cast the first stone too if you want if it's legal. I'm not a vigilante. I'm not going to take it into my own hands. If it were legal, if they were the law of the land like it used to be in Massachusetts back before they became communist.
By the way, sodomy used to be illegal everywhere in America until 60 years ago. It was illegal in all of the states. By the way, did you know that; I don’t like to say the word, how my sexuality … queerness sodomy did you know that it was illegal in America 50, 60 years ago but that it is actually today illegal in 79 countries, did you know that? Just because we at America are filled with perverts it doesn’t mean the rest of the world puts up with it.
The most populated country in the world is India and it's illegal there, where they have 1.4 billion people. It's illegal in 78 other counties that still have a brain in their head that actually stops some semblance of morality and righteousness, "Oh, it's getting quiet in here. Oh, I'm getting little nervous." I'm not scared to you, that’s what the bible says.
For me that’s a deal-breaker, just work closely with sodomites and perverts. I'm not saying that you're wrong if you go to your job and hold your nose and deal with it whatever. That’s between you and the Lord and it's getting worse and worse whether everywhere. Again, those are deal-breakers for me.
Then here are some things that I think are not deal-breakers. My boss cast me out. I never had a job where my boss cast me out. Where are you working? Are they hiring? Every single time I heard that I've been cast out by the boss, I was even doing a good job. They still catch out.
Here's the thing. Obviously, you got to make your own decisions. I'm not trying to impose my opinions on you here.my opinion is being cast out by the boss, people blasting wordly music, you're going to be around sinners if you work in a job and that you can’t just expect to work at a job where everybody is a bible-believing Christ and everything is righteous and godly. Obviously, we're in the world. You're going to work with sinful people.
The bible tells us to separate from Christians that are sinful. You know what? When it comes to the sinners of this world, he said, "If you were to separate from the fornicators of this world, you got to get out of the world," because that’s what the world is. The world is filled with sinners. I don’t think that we should just completely isolate ourselves from the sinners of this world, the haven of this world because we need to be a testimony unto them. I don’t think these are deal-breakers. You have to figure out where you draw the line.
All that to say today in this sermon. I hope his sermon just make you think about what is a deal-breaker and what is not. Because you don’t want to throw out the baby with the bath water and just completely just if every … if a church isn't perfect I won’t go there. If this girl or this guy isn't perfect then I'm not going to date them or marry them. If this job is not the perfect, saved, sanctified, separated job then I can’t work there.
Look, you're looking for unicorn at that point and they don’t exist. You need to just understand that sometimes there are things that are not deal-breakers. I hope that you will think this through and decide for yourself biblically what are deal-breakers and what are not. I think I've proven biblically when it comes to a church, wrong gospel, wrong bible and l[acknowledge of sowing our deal-breakers.
I think I've proven biblically that a spouse that’s unsaved doesn’t love the Lord or is a divorcee that should be a deal-breaker. I think some of these other things you can’t really make the biblical case that they are deal-breakers. When it comes to a job, we have to work somewhere. Again, we all have our own different convictions and I'm not trying to impose my convictions upon you. You shouldn't try to impose your convictions on me because of the fact that when the bible doesn’t spell it out specifically then we believe in liberty of the individual.
Now when it comes to an unsaved spouse, that’s spelled out in the bible. When it comes to churches using a bible that’s taking things out, that is spelled out in the bible. When it comes to some of these other issues that are not spelled out in the bible, we should all left up to our own individual liberties between us and God if there's no clear scripture pointing us.
For example, when I was in the fire alarm business, I did fire alarms at CBS pharmacy. There's a lot of things in CBS pharmacy that I don’t agree with. Probably most of what they sell is junk. I still put in a fire alarm for them, because I didn’t think it was wrong for me to just run electrical wires and install fire alarm wire there.
I never had a problem even doing a fire alarm in churches that were apostate churches, because again I'm not doing it as a volunteer. I'm just there making money running electrical wires. There were times when I did draw the line when I was told, "Hey, it's 9:00 at night. Check the fire alarm in this bar or in this strip club." I was like, "I don’t want to go in that place and be exposed to all that stuff that’s going on." That was just me where I had a line that I drew and then I felt like it was biblical, what I should be around and what I should not be around, where I could keep a pure mind and still love the Lord with all my heart and where I would go in a place where the temptations would be too great and the vexation would be too great and where I shouldn't be in that atmosphere.
We need to decide what's a deal-breaker and what is not. Because honestly you're not going to find a perfect and then a lot of people they're not providing properly for their wife or kids because the fact that just every job is too sinful. It's like, "Wait a minute, you need to get your butt to work and a lot of times it doesn’t have to do with convictions. It is just being lazy so let's just find excuses why every job is not legit.
Some people will even say, "Oh my job wanted me to be dishonest." Really it was just the job one of them to work to work hard and then they just say, "They wanted me to be dishonest." No, they want you to work. Where were you? This church they're wrong on this. No, you just didn’t want to go to church because you're lazy. Oh, this girl I didn’t talk to her. No, you didn’t have the guts to talk to her because you're scared. There's nothing wrong with her. To find some wrong with the church, find some wrong with the girl, find some wrong with the job because they're actually just being lazy so then they just talk about the unicorn that they're looking for.
We need to decide what are the deal-breakers in our lives and what are not the deal-breakers. What is it that’s the high place where it's not good but whatever. Then the things of you're worshipping idols. That’s a deal-breaker when we think of these Old Testament kings. Then one you decide what the deal-breakers are you need to stick with your convictions and stick with those deal-breakers and say, "I will not compromise on these," and then the things that are not deal-breakers you can look pass them. I'm not saying you're condoning them. I'm not saying that they're right, but just realizing that we live in an imperfect world. It's that simple.
Let's bow our heads and have a word of prayer. Father, we thank you so much for Your word Lord and we thank you for the fact that there are a lot of churches out there that still preach the right gospel and use the King James Bible and do soul winning Lord. There are lot of churches that are still doing these things. Lord, we thank you so much for our church, Faithful Word Baptist Church. Lord, we pray to You just guide us all to the right church, the right spouse and the right job, Lord, because these are 3 major decisions in our life that are of critical importance and Jes- …